I am told it’s Canadian Thanksgiving today. While I’m not from Canada, I’m having my own little giving of thanks anyhow, so it feels apropos.
Today is my 38th birthday.
While 38 isn’t a round-number milestone for my age, it marks the 10th anniversary of my mother’s funeral. I still miss her very, very much. One of my greatest regrets is that she didn’t live to meet Caitlin.
This has been an emotionally difficult year for me, which is why I’ve been relatively scarce around these parts. While I’ve had some very visible successes, there have been some disappointments and difficult choices experienced in private that have impacted me more than I cared to admit. My friends and family are aware of them. I’m not comfortable discussing them publicly on the internet.
But I’ve also, unfortunately, not coped very gracefully with them in real life. I’ve been closing myself off, bottling things up, and then breaking down.
Which is… not the healthiest way to handle things. I recognize this. Some things have gotten a little bit better. I’ve come to better terms with other things.
I’m doing better, now, and I hope to continue to improve, and to find my inner squee once more.
You have helped. More than you can know.
I am so very, very grateful to every single one of you that has reached out to me over the past few months, and/or have done so for my birthday. Your generous outpouring of love and support mean so very, very much to me.
I am, in a word, completely overwhelmed.
I am so very, very grateful to have you all in my life. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to express it properly. All I can offer is my words.
Really, thank you. From the bottom of my heart.
I have enjoyed your writings before, and am glad to see you are able to continue. Thanks for the update.
(Not any ane you know in meatspace)